All I Ever Wanted To Be

I can’t remember ever not wanting to be a Mom or really wanting to do anything else; I’m sure that’s mostly because I had an amazing role model in my own mom. While other little girls were pretending to be princesses, I was caring for my dolls and stuffed animals. After my mom died, Dad told me I’d existed before I was born because Mom was thinking about me, her future daughter, when they met at 17. That made sense to me because I’d been planning and thinking about being a mom pretty much always. ⁠

My three little birds* did not disappoint. Each brought their own wacky sense of self and strong personality and, honestly, it was just plain fun parenting and loving them. Sure, being a mom is hard too (like really hard sometimes), and now that they’re all grown and flown, I can reflect back on really difficult moments blended in with the craziness and laughter and love, but I wouldn’t go back and change a thing. Those difficult moments not only helped my kids grow, but they helped me grow. ⁠

I started young. When all my friends were heading to graduate school or starting careers while partying in clubs and at music festivals, I was covered in baby food (and worse), listening to Barney the Dinosaur and Raffi’s Baby Beluga… on repeat. I didn’t really discover the popular music of the late 80s and early 90s until my oldest became old enough to not want to listen to “baby music.” Sure, I missed out on Tupac and Nirvana — and Seinfeld (I was watching Sesame Street and Blues Clues), but I didn’t miss it. Not for a second because I was having too much fun finger painting and getting kisses and hugs and “Wuvoos’’ and snuggles and “weasel weasels.” ⁠

My little birds are all grown up now (well mostly), and I couldn’t be prouder of the adult humans they are. Brave. Creative. Funny. Caring. Open-Minded. Kind.⁠

I know I can sit here today writing this, knowing I’m beyond lucky to have had my amazing mom and healthy and happy kids. And, I’m so grateful for it all. ⁠

Happy Mother’s Day if you celebrate! Big hugs if today is complicated!⁠

*I’m a big Bob Marley Fan :)⁠




College Admissions Consultant. Mindfulness in College Admissions. Author: Hey AdmissionsMom: Real Talk from Reddit.

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College Admissions Consultant. Mindfulness in College Admissions. Author: Hey AdmissionsMom: Real Talk from Reddit.

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